Though I'm thankful for the break I've got from CNY (I slept and ate a lot more than usual), when I look at the amount of work that needs to be done still and things I am doing but not well, it just puts me into a "emo" state. Given all the sessions and talk about not wasting our lives away, it is a real temptation to just throw everything aside and be contented to live a "normal" life without things to rock the boat I am in. Am I really that incompetent to be unable to think and work things through? Or am I just unwilling to give up my comfort zones? Judging by the way I would prefer to spend my time, I think my personal space is still very much guarded and until I learn to give that up, I would not be expecting any breakthrough where I am... So what if I am serving in many different areas? All these do not give a good gauge of where I stand before God...
I do thank God for showing me this BIG crack in my life. I'm asking that He help me to sort it out within...
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